Burnout…are you giving too much of yourself to the point of exhaustion?

photo from success.com

Are you helping other hurting hearts to the point of burnout or exhaustion and you have nothing left to give?

I talk a lot about loving humanity and our planet in my blog, but there has to be a balance between helping humanity and our world and taking care of ourselves too.

I want the world to have all the precious gifts you have to offer! Here are some tips that I pray you find helpful so you will have more to give others and yourself. The Bible says to love your neighbor and yourself….. It is not all about saving the world it is also about saving yourself too!

When you fly on an airplane the stewardess goes over some guidelines in case there is an emergency. One of the things they go over is, if there is an emergency and there is a loss of oxygen, they tell you to put your oxygen on first, then assist other passengers. This is a perfect analogy for our life! If we don’t take care of ourselves, first, we can not help others. If we are lacking oxygen and are out of commission we will not be able to help anyone else. This is the same for our lives. If we are helping others to the point of exhaustion then we will eventually have nothing else to give and we are no longer able to help anyone. We will become out of commission. The world needs you and the precious  gifts you have to give it! When you are giving to the point of exhaustion and burnout you are short changing the world and those around you! It is not selfish to take care of yourself, it is selfish if you don’t take care of yourself…remember that.

Ok…now you have burnt yourself out from giving too much of yourself…now what?

Disclaimer: This blog post is not to diagnose or treat anything…it is purely for informational purposes. Food for thought. Read through it and see if anything resonates with you that may be helpful. Use what calls to you and leave what doesn’t. If you feel you are in a crisis please see a medical professional, crisis line or a professional counselor. If you do not feel strong enough to face your past emotions and feelings on your own then please do not go further with this blog post and seek professional help. I am not a counselor in any way, I have been through a lifetime of deep hardships to the point that I did not feel like I could go on at times. I am simply sharing with you things that I have done to help me through the hardships and difficulties of my life. People always ask me why I am so happy most of the time, and I am…it is because I learned some things through the hard knocks of life that have helped me deal with my struggles and overcome them. I have gotten so good at facing hardships in my life now, that I am able to face extreme emotional pain and be ok with it, I have become a warrior, I have overcome! I am now able to glean the lessons and move on. I found that in my times of hardships is where the presence of God is the strongest and sweetest and it is in this place that wisdom flows…maybe I have matured in my faith and in my life now through the hardships to find there is also a gift in the hardship. In the book of James in the Bible it says to consider it joy when we face hardships of many kinds because God is doing a good work in us. It is not in the good times that we grow, but in the hard times.

I am going to now share some of the things that have helped me get through the hard times in my life…yes we are talking about burnout here, but I believe all the things in our lives that we have not dealt with, build up over time and contribute to burnout.

“the unexamined life is not worth living” -Socrates

One thing I find very helpful is to first go somewhere quiet where you can be alone and undisturbed. It would be good to do this when you have at least a half a day to a day or a whole weekend would even be better so you have plenty of time to be present with yourself, alone,  to really feel your feelings and Be with them and take inventory of your life. It may even be a good idea to check into a hotel somewhere, where you can be totally alone with no distractions. Going to a park by a flowing stream where you can be alone and hearing the gentle rush of the stream may be another good place to do this.

Bring a journal.

Go somewhere quiet and be still and get in touch with all the emotions you are feeling. Really feel all your emotions and feelings…befriend them. None of the feelings and emotions you are going through are bad…they are your friends. Don’t resist any feeling, thoughts, or emotions. BE with all of it. Just sit still and close your eyes and feel them, really feel all of them deeply. Love all of them, the good, bad and the ugly. Resist nothing. All these feelings and emotions we go through is just part of being human. It is all ok.

Bask in the presence of all your past griefs, hurts, sorrows, despairs, places where you have unforgiveness for others, write down where you felt you failed others or they failed you. Start from the time you can remember until now…and just Be with it all. The combination of all these things is what probably contributed to your current burnout. If you feel like crying, cry. If you feel angry hit a pillow until you feel better. This  is a great time to get your journal out and write down everything from the time you can remember until now. Write down anything and everything that has upset you in any way. Don’t leave anything out. Don’t resist any emotions that come up…Be with them and love them. It is ok.  Journaling is a great way to work through upsets and hurts and to help release pent up energy from our past and present. What you are doing is releasing all the energy around your upsets. It is all your pent up energies from past and present upsets that has probably put you in the situation you are in now. When you have written down and felt everything that has upset you, reread what you wrote down and add to it as you go. The more times you reread what you wrote and become present to your past upsets the better you should feel.  Keep reading what you wrote over and over until you feel better about it all. Feel your upsets, journal them, talk to them…anything that allows to you to feel them fully so they can be honored. Ask God for His healing touch and wisdom…ask God to make you whole. Lovingly thank them for showing up and thank them for the lessons you learned from them and continue to learn from them and lovingly tell them that you are going to move on and release them. This may take a while…don’t rush this process. Let it unfold naturally. Be with this step as long as you need to. Surrender it all to God. Let God’s love flow through you… When you have overcome you will be stronger and wiser to then help others do the same. To be the light! God is preparing you for what is ahead for you…something wonderful! Warrior of the light…you can do this! Pray to God for wisdom and guidance through this magnificent journey you are on. Don’t fear or resist what you are going through, embrace it, lean into it.

What I shared above is a very important step that I have gone through and continue to go through as new hurts come up for me. It is an ongoing process. When you get complete with all your past hurts there will be more that show up as you live your live. Don’t stop feeling and loving all your emotions and hurts. Feel them, journal them, and them release them. Don’t resist anything…let them flow. Always look for the gifts and lessons to be learned from them.

Another thing you can do is to ask yourself what is causing you your burnout. Chances are if you ask yourself this question you will have some answers. Write your answers down and ask yourself what you can do to remedy the things causing your burnout.

What is causing you stress in your life? Take a piece of paper and write it all down. What are some things you can do to remedy these things causing you stress and write them down and take action. For instance, are you stressed about money? How can you reduce your bills or spending? Do you need to get a part time job? Can you quit your expensive cable bill? Can you reduce your phone bill? Can  you downsize? Are you stressed for time? How can you make more time for yourself? What can you say no to to make more time for yourself? etc…

What are you tolerating in your life and write it down. What can you do about it and take action. What people in your life are energy drainers? Are you able to not see them any more or reduce the time you spend with them?

Be mindful of what is causing you stress in your day to day life and write them down as they come up. How can you reduce these things or get rid of them?

Be authentic in your life. Don’t do things you don’t feel comfortable doing. Do the things you love and stop doing the things you don’t like. Of course there are some tolerations we have to put up with and sometimes we have to do things for our loved ones or for others that we have to do, but keep a balance to it. Don’t sell yourself out, compromise. Being authentic is super important. If you are not living an authentic life and you are trying to do what you feel others want you to do, but it is not what you want to do, is super stressful. Don’t live behind a mask be yourself! Don’t do things to just look good. Be yourself 100%. It is ok, you are beautiful just the way you are. Come alive to your true self!

Take good care of yourself and lead a balanced life! It is for the good of humanity!

Sleep at least eight to nine hours a night or what is good enough for you to feel well rested.

Eat well. The vegan diet is super healthy for you and the planet! Make sure your vegan diet is balanced and all whole food based ie: lots of fresh vegetables, fruits, greens, a handful of nuts and seeds, and lots of super foods. Reduce your sugar, salt, and alcohol intake. A glass of wine is great, but don’t drink the whole bottle.

Vegetable juice. I recommend a big glass of juice daily. Juice it and drink it right away. I highly recommend buying a vegetable juicer, it is the elixir of life. You can buy a cheap one for about 70.00 at your local department store.. It is well worth the investment! A good basic vegetable juice is four carrots, three stalks of celery, some broccoli, some parsley, 1/2 a lemon, some kale, throw in some spring mix salad, add one apple and juice it up.  Drink it right away. I like to add a tablespoon of ground flax to the juice also and then drink it.

Take a good multi vitamin and B-complex daily with food.

Drink 8-10 glasses of quality water, I like distilled water.

Get lots of exercise. Make it fun and do the things you like to do. Do you like to go to the gym? Dance in your living room to great music? Go salsa dancing? Bike? Go for walks in the park? Walk your dog? Try to get at least 1/2 hour of exercise daily, one hour would be even better. Exercise is a big stress reliever.

Nature is a really great stress reliever. Go for long hikes.

Journal all your feelings daily. Journaling is very healing! It allows your feelings to flow and release.

Meditate 20 minutes 1-2 times daily. See my mediation post on how to meditate.

Worship. Go to youtube and put on some worship music with the lyrics and sing the songs as if you are singing them to God. This really helps me when I am in a funk. Prayer, ask God to help you and give you wisdom on what to do. Listen to what God is telling you to do and do it. Listen to your gut, follow your intuition. If something does not feel right in your gut, maybe you should not do it. I have found that every time I go against my gut feeling it is a mistake.

Keep your life simple. Keep your life calm and don’t take on too much. Say No to things that don’t inspire you. Only say yes to the things you need to do and say yes to the things you love to do. Reduce the things that don’t make you happy and add more of the things that make you happy.

Declutter your house and life. Get rid of stuff you don’t use. Keep your house clean and organized. This is so important to me when I am in a funk or feel stressed out. Streamline all your routines.

Keep a datebook and write down everything you need to do. This helps reduce the stress of trying to remember everything and not forget stuff…that can be stressful.

Hug your pets often.

Get a massage.

Some wellness centers have Himalayan salt rooms, these rooms are high vibe rooms with pure air. They are a great place to get re-centered.

Laugh a lot, go to comedy clubs, watch comedies on TV, laugh for the fun of it. Laugh at life. Lighten up!

Get social. Hang out with people that make you happy. Do fun things together. Reduce hanging out with people that stress you out or are negative.

The Bible says to only dwell on things that are beautiful, pure and uplifting. Don’t dwell on negativity. Reduce your exposure to the news, it is mostly negative. Find some quotes that make you happy and dwell on those quotes throughout your day. Find some positive affirmations and think on these. Stay positive and don’t be negative. If you are feeling negative, how can you turn this into a positive. What lessons are you learning.

Find your passion and do it! Live an authentic life. Follow your heart.

Talk to your friends. Getting all your feelings out is important. They need to flow, do not resist them. Talk to a counselor if you need to. Talking about your problems, hurts, griefs, etc… helps to reduce all the energy behind these stressors and helps to release that negative pent up energy… to be healthy you need to allow all your feelings and emotions to flow like  a river.

Resolve all the conflicts in your life past and present. If you are upset with someone or someone is upset with you, past or present…work it out. Unsettled business is stressful! forgive everyone…easier said than done. If you are having trouble forgiving someone ask God to help you. Forgiveness is for you.

Don’t dwell on the troubles of the world, God has this! By you being well you are making a difference.

Read books that inspire you.

Don’t be afraid to live your life fully and to experience everything life has for you, including your feelings and emotions, the good, the bad and painful ones. It is all about embracing the human experience.

Be well,  Warrior of the light!

Love Kim.

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